Make sure you catch Episode 4 (or the show notes) & Episode 5 (or the show notes) if you haven’t already because we’re trying to take you through our autism journey chronologically.
What was really exhausting was going to 2 professionals before the professional who actually gave us the diagnosis, and constantly being told “not to worry” – “they didn’t see anything, there were no red flags etc.”
This was all while Hunter was 2. And to a certain extent, I understand the apprehension for a professional to make a diagnosis too soon. From all of the professionals I’ve happened to chat with – from teachers to medical doctors – most parents don’t want to accept their child’s diagnosis. And that is a main force driving these professionals not wanting to make an early, possibly incorrect, diagnosis. BUT I feel so deeply about early intervention and the difference it has made in Hunter’s life.
I shouldn’t have had to work so hard for someone to hear me. Everyone kept telling me “he’s going to be fine. He’s only 2.” This was well-meaning friends, teachers etc; but this is why I say to always follow your gut. This is one of the instances where my ‘persistent, confident’ personality paid off – I had to keep pushing forward because it wasn’t something he was going to grow out of.
It took us THREE professionals to find someone who truly heard me, listened to our concerns, and agreed that it was worth pursuing further evaluation on Hunter. So I’m here to tell you to keep going if you’re really having these concerns.
Hunter is doing amazing now, and I firmly believe that early intervention has made the difference. It can take a long time to make (or see) progress. We’ve learned so much since the diagnosis and we honestly still have so much more to learn.
Keep going when you’re not getting good enough answers. And there’s a fine line between being persistent and not accepting the truth. I can tell you that I would have trusted the third professional if she said there wasn’t anything present at that time. BUT I also would have asked her what was our plan if we weren’t seeing any changes or improvements in a reasonable amount of time. Sort of like taking your child to the pediatrician and they don’t “see” anything wrong, so they say “let’s wait a week and see where we’re at.”
My biggest advice to you is don’t give up when you’re searching for the answers. When you do find a qualified professional who is really listening to you, though, and maybe just isn’t giving you the answer you’re looking for, but they’re giving you a thoughtful answer, you can accept that.
But don’t just listen to everyone telling you not to worry. Trust your gut. Me trusting my gut and pushing forward is what has made such a big impact in Hunter’s progress – I know it.
It’s made such a big impact because Hunter is learning things about himself, but Chance & I have also learned a ton. We’re able to parent him better and do the things that he needs from us to help. It’s given us more understanding, and we’ve been able to be more intentional about the steps we take for Hunter to help him.
I felt so much relief when we got the answer and that’s what I want for you. Don’t give up the search. Don’t give up getting the answers that are right for your child or your family. Just because you can’t “see” something doesn’t mean it isn’t there.
DM us on Instagram @messy_wonderful if you need a friend to listen 🙂
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